Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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