i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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