Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
i believe in u and ur pee
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
