Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
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