You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
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