i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Randomize