Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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