do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
