With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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