I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
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