ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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