I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Randomize