My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
