the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
