The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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