Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
