she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
