white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
