What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
