So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
