help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
23 Insane Reasons People Got Fired
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
were you high?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
These 31 Gross People Really Put The ‘Trash’ In ‘Trashed’
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.