did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
