...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
