Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
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