from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
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I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
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I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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