it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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