go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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