we're blogging at a bar
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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