i was rollin on her like bob the builder
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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