Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
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