Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize
