Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
