do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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