apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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