He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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