Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
