I think I died a long time ago.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
