she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize