They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
