literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Randomize