I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i wish my penis had a tongue
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
