Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
