loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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