i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
We were destined to go to rehab together
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
