It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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