is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Randomize
