I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
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