I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize