Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Randomize
