Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
