So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
My ATM looks so different sober.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I'm at about main and main street
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
